just some thoughts cause it's you guys

bit · just some thoughts cause it's you guys

I was responding to a thread Hertha started about the slightest try. It got me a little sad because I'm quickly running out of time. There's so much to learn, and so much we don't even know yet, and I know in another 50 years, if we keep progressing in a postive direction with horses, it's going to be amazing! I'm 58, so I'm hoping for a least another 25 years of good riding in me. Right now I'm good for a fast gallop, or jumping a pretty good size jump. I can sit just about anything a horse does, and can ride for a good 3 hours thanks to a new saddle and a good gaited horse. I'm not sure how long this will be so, so every day is very precious to me. If ya'll have been reading ntcmtngirl's posts on "welcome newcomers" you know how fleeting life can get. People my age are dying of natural causes and boy that really scares me some days. I'm just starting to get comfortable with myself, loving where I am in life, and one of the best things is HORSES! I'm living the dream I had as a kid. This life is a place I've been heading for since I was three years old. I knew then. I knew.
I was thinking, if there is reincarnation, I'd want to come back so that I could do it a little sooner and a lot better with horses. I thought about it and wondered if I already had. Maybe that was the plan all along. I came back and did it sooner and a lot better with horses. I mean, the first time I saw them, I went into this stupor of bliss. I was in love. Nothng else was as good, or beautiful, or wonderful, or graceful, or funny, or perfect. Like I had always known them, and was meeting them again, for the the first time.
Do any of you feel like this? Like they've always been there in your life, and when you are with them it's familiar?
Maybe some of us here all agreed at one point in time we'd come together and celebrate our love of horses. We'd find one another, no matter what and be there for each other through fear and injury, death and incredible joy. This is like one joyous reunion of horse and human, isn't it? Why else would I buy a sore backed, over weight, grumpy, bitch of a mare that tried to buck me off the first time I sat on her? Why would Elaine find Levi waiting for her in her pasture the day after she sent Jet flying home? We promised we find one another, and no matter what, NO MATTER WHAT, we'd find a way to be together. Sometimes it's the human that finds the horse, sometimes it's the horse that finds the human. I know it got it right because I'm here, right where I knew I'd be.

AlythLong

Hi Bit,

I understand where you're coming from. I am 67 and a cancer survivor. Having that battle was life changing for me. Instead of working hard to make ends meet I now enjoy every day. Whether I am at work, or playing at home with my horses. I understand that what we give out so we get back and try (don't always succeed!!) not to hurt anyone, perhaps even help sometimes. I learn what I can, understanding that the teacher will appear when I am ready. And we are planning a sensible "retirement" where I can enjoy my horses all day long!!!

As for the future, time will take care of that!! I saw a "centurion" video on youtube, where the combined age of horse and rider must be not less than 100. There was an 87 year old lady riding a 15 year old horse doing a dressage test - so that has become my aim!! I have 20 years to learn dressage!!!

Hugs, Alyth

4theloveofjake

Aww Deb, alot of what you said hit home. I'm 42 but my lovely mare is 21. How much longer can we be together ? How many more years will she be able to teach me all that I need to know ? When will I have the unlimited time of retirement to bask in their glory ?
When will I not be too tired to ride after a long day of work and family duties ? My dream is waiting out my back door and I'm cleaning the dishes or baking lasagna. I want to be out there with her. With them...
When will Jake be the partner that Willow is ? Will Powder be too small for my daughter soon ,next year or the year after that ?
I can only say to remember Elaine's thread about the power of now and soak up every single second of bliss with them. That is my goal everyday.

And when we die we will ride horses in heaven, love has no end

jackspark

It's 6:00am and I'm up early to ride and I thought I'd check and see what my girls were up to. Well you all were up to exactly what I worry about daily! Bit, you make me cry. We are all on the same road; Sherry a little further behind and Sonja leading the way. How lucky are we to have a passionate obsession, but with it seems to come this fear of loss. Will we meet and ride in heaven? God willing, I hope so

I love you all and am sooooooo greatful that I found you.

4theloveofjake

Well we're pretty darn glad you're here Nancy, love ya too !!!

Reminds me of a Mary Anne Kennedy's song ........

And when I die, I don't want to fly, I just want to ride, ride, ride....horses in heaven.
If I leave here before you do, I'll have them saddled when you leave and we'll ride into eternity .....

I love that song and I cannot accept that once we die it's over, I never want to be without horses, no you're not alone in your thinking Deb, not at all !!!

whudson

Man you guys are deep.

I don't mean that in a bad way. I too have had all the same thoughts though I try not to go there...you see I plan on living to the ripe healthy age of 90 and die in my sleep

Dressage test come on !!!! (I've never done dreaage in my life

)

I am 48 and my horse is 15...my goal is to wake up in the morning and hear the wonderful noises he makes while he contentedly eats or just stands and for that to be the last thing I hear before I go to sleep. To look out over my green pasture ....that is all mine. To know that he always has enough to eat

Couple of little quotes from the book Ashram Tang by April Crawford.

Fear is the true root of all mishap...

Life Minus Fear Equals Evolution..

If you haven't guessed, I'll give you a clue, the master of the universe is insdie of you..

jackspark

Oh lord Wanda, YOU know better than to mention a book that I haven't read

I'll be on Amazon later today

You all are such great teachers

whudson

ElaineW

BIT!!!!!!!

I have read this thread 3 times now,, trying to find the best way to word what I feel. Have started my reply 3 times now! While moving my living room furniture my mind has been stirring, trying to grasp what I want to say and plop it down here in words.
But, ya know I am not always as good with the written word as I want to be sometimes. You all are so much better at it than I am!

Dearest friends,,
I feel the same way as you all do, this life is so very short and fleeting. Bit, your doing the same thing I did awhile back. What If'ing. Not to long ago we thought we might lose our lease where we have our guys. I FREAKED OUT. What if I can't keep (at the time) Jet? What if I can't find another horse when Jet's gone? What if I can't get the money together to buy a new horse? What if I fall, wreck,get sick, die, drown ( I commercial fish). Geez, i could go on and on.
I just started my journey with horses a little bit over 2 years ago! So I am still GREEN! Nancy, I am VERY, VERY greatful you found this forum! You suggested Eckhart Tolle to me!

Bit! Youve been watching me post since I joined the savvy club. The distance we have come is awesome! Everyone who has helped me has sped my learning up 100%.
With out Carol making this forum I don't think I would have came so far so fast! Through our Eckhart thread I have learned more about ME than I have at any point in my entire life!
Tomorrow I turn 38!
Which brings me to Levi,,my friend was watching me with him the other day. She said "You know, God gave you that horse don't ya"?
I am humbled by Levi, he's EVERYTHING I want in a horse. Right down to his size! My gift to Jet was a peaceful, loving passing. I think my gift for doing that for Jet is Levi.
I have never ever ever ever felt this way about any other horse. Is it the horse or ME that's made the change? Did I attract Levi? By me treating him like a dream horse, am I 'turning' him into the horse I 'want'?
Chance was my bad boy, like the boy your mom warns you about. Drop dead beautiful, rough around the edges and wilder than a buck!
Jet was my patient, kind teacher. Never waivering, all ways gentle. Jet and I had a connection, but it was not complete. Time cut us short. Jet mourned for his previous owner.
Now I have Levi,, My personal grouth has made my progress with him jump forward so fast! Those around me are shocked at how fast we are moving along! Levi is not perfect, neither am I. But as a team we are getting better.
As for time and learning,, I don't know what level of horsemanship I will get to, but I am having a fantastic time learning!
To you all,, Thank you for your friendship!
I would LOVE for us all to meet one day..
I am glad ALL OF YOU are going through this journey with me!
Hugs, high 5's and love to you all!
With Gratitude,
Elaine Wailgum

Peeperpuppy

So many of my k9 mentors died when I was quite young. The next most significant one arrived in my late 20's. He's an older guy - though he's by no means an old man. I was watching him work with someone else & their dog & my mind began to dwell & build fear that he would pass before I learned from him. Plus I respect him so deeply that it'd rip out a chunk of heart to lose him. As it typical, he's a bit of a mind reader. The ending of the day he told a story about his own mentor.

My teacher had done something he shouldn't have & the result was his mentor making him destroy everything connected with the mistake. The fear is that it might weaken the work. My teacher was upset by what happened, the mentor's response was like a dark storm flattening everything in his path, "I do not have time to suffer the mistakes of your youth." It was many years later that my teacher understood why his mentor appeared so over the top. It's because there comes a time when you realize time is short & anything that threatened the forward momentum of the journey is intolerable. My teacher has grown more appreciative of this harsh lesson because it's been nothing but good that he learned it early.

We are in the here & now with the animals for a purpose. The animals we have come to teach. Some get to be with us a long time, some but a fleeting moment. I don't personally believe in reincarniation - who knows maybe some day I'll look at it differently - but for the way I believe, I'm happy to do my part in my purpose for being here, for being placed in the path of others & for others placed in my path. Whatever is the next step after my own passing... I'll be there with my boots on & a good attitude to see what's next.

On the sadness, I hope you don't let it stay with you. Life's a dance... eventually the music fades into the background & we move on to what's next. I look forward to the next step yet I hope it's not for a lot of good years!!!

bit

I can't wait to get up every morning, and don't want to go to sleep at night because every day is so full of life. I often go out at midnight, look at the stars, hang with the herd, barn cats winding themselves around my legs, and lightening bugs lighting up the trees. I love this simple life and every day just keeps getting better. I'm not sad, just hoping I get a lot more time to bask in the magic of it all. I'm so THANKFUL. It just keeps getting better, and I have you all to come share it all with, and not amble down this path alone. Hope you all know it's not out of sadness that I write. It's coming from a grateful heart. I feel like I living my life's purpose. I couldn't have written a better, more amazing life story. Elaine, could you have even began to imagine your story? What a ride.

jackspark

new2thejourney

I LOVE this thread.

Have you ever thought that perhaps you are just where you need to be? And in yourself you have lived the Pat Parelli,the Tom Dorrance and Ray Hunt?.....Bit........you are all those people combined in time. The only difference is that you are living it in this time frame. You ARE those experiences, you - me - we are that knowledge and lifetime personal expereince. You have lived what you are yet to know in this lifetime. You are, my dear, exactly where you need to be - whether it is for you, for your parter, your kids or your horses. This knowledge and experience you wish you had more time with lives within you and exists now. YOU HAVE IT! It is all there.

But like you - damned if I wished it could have come when I was 8 years old rather than say - 88 years old.

Eterenal memory sees no time line. Just this existence. Rule out 'time' 'age' 'expereince'. You have it.

Belived me Deb....you have 'IT'. I belived it. I feel it. You ARE Buck just in a different existence.....you are a horse....just in a different existence.

You got it babe!

xxxx

(Really hope this doesn't sound muddled. I'm very clear in my understanding of this - whether I'm right or wrong, it doens't matter to me, but I feel happy in my opinion!)

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Carry on with 'normal' conversation!

Karen
xx