| Archive for It's About The Horse The Free Forum for those Doing Parelli - and a whole lot More! "Anything forced and misunderstood can never be beautiful." Xenophon (430-355 B.C.), |
| 4theloveofjake |
NCMtnGirlDoes anyone know what happened to her ? Haven't seen her post in a very long time... |
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| Pedestal*Pony |
I know me either. | ||
| becky b |
I sent her an email so hopefully we will hear something back from her. Hope everything is ok with her and her family. | ||
| 4theloveofjake |
Thanks Becky ! | ||
| thelmanelle |
Her and Scott. He has disappeared, too. | ||
| NCMtnGirl |
Hey Ya'll-
I'm here, and gosh.. thanks so much for asking about me. I apologize for my absence and would like to now communicate where I have been. I'm sorry I haven't had the courage to do so sooner. And please forgive my lengthy reply. I don't know how to do this without detailing my heart to you, regarding it Please feel free to scan over it, if you like. Right after Christmas of this year, a turn of events occurred that would begin staging me for some of the most intense and challenging days I've ever known. My husband Jeff, began discussing down-sizing my small heard of young horses as well as my finding another home for my 'hot' riding mare. He felt a boarding situation would be better for me. He was concerned that all I did was sling hay, muck stalls, haul manure, repair fencing, etc. He felt I never had time to ride and enjoy my horsemanship. It didn't take me long to conclude he had made a good point and I felt strongly that I needed to heed it. It was a most heart-wrenching decision but one by one, I managed to get them all placed in new pastures I felt comfortable with. I did experience major withdrawal pangs for a few months having horses I had come to love so much, no longer around me. But somehow I knew it was best. I was free now to make road trips w/ my daughter Audrey who as some of you may recall, is physically challenged. We enjoyed going back down to our coastal home every other week, enabling us to spend more time with my husband Jeff. He has been waiting on our house there to sell before retiring to the mountains to be with us full-time, where Audrey needs to be for her medical care. It was nice to feel somewhat rested, even though I did miss the daily chores around the barn. This new found rest however, was short lived. A few months after my settling into the big transition, the reason 'why' my horses would need to be placed came into full circle. In March of this year, (wiping tears here big-time now), my wonderful husband and best friend Jeff, was diagnosed with a large malignant tumor in his cecum, a pouch at the beginning of ones colon that connects the large intestine to the small. Even worst, this primary tumor in his cecum had spread other tumors to his liver. We were told he had at best, only a few months to live. His liver was carrying 95% of the tumor load that had originated from the 'primary' tumor in his colon, leaving his liver inoperable. My husband has always been and is still today, even in the midst of his current physical struggles, a positive, energetic, happy man- someone I do not want to live my life without. In a moment, everything changed for us on a otherwise routine Friday afternoon. A GI specialist approached me with a very concerned look on his face. He had just concluded a colonoscopy in an attempt to locate the cause of extreme symptoms Jeff was having in his colon region. He came into Jeff's room and asked me to please sit down so we could talk. Jeff was still asleep from the anesthesia and all of a sudden I am hearing in a very gentle tone of voice, that my husband has a large and significant mass located in his cecum. And that also noticed, were similar lesions on his liver. He goes on to tell me he is almost certain this is not good news for Jeff and that he is sending tissue from the tumor off to be biopsied. Naturally I was stunned beyond belief but did manage to ask a few questions. The devastating responses I received was that he was of the opinion Jeff was a very sick man with a poor prognosis. That treatment for a complete recovery might not be available due to the tumors on his liver. You can't imagine the shock this was to me. It hit me head on with a force I honestly did not know how to deal with- I was literally traumatized- I won't go on and on here about how devastated I was, but once Jeff woke up and I had ever so carefully told him about what was found, (my choice to do so and one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life), I absolutely lost it on his chest in that hospital room. Even in his drowsy state, he knew I was on my way off of a mental cliff that I might not survive, even though it was he that was in trouble. He later told me he realized he had to think quick to save me from a complete melt down. In his great wisdom, he sat up in bed, took my shoulders in his hands and with the greatest conviction I have ever known him to have he smiled and said, 'honey, we're going to change the course of this thing. I'm not ready to die, I have unfinished business to attend yet. We can beat this diagnosis, but we'll have to do it together. It's going to take 100% of both our focus and determination'. I managed to get a hold of myself after deciding I didn't have time for the fear that had began to paralyze me. I had to drive us home and as we both sat quietly during that time, I began staging our fight for a solution in my mind, that very day. After a few 'vague' consults with local oncologist', I convinced Jeff that even though we hadn't been advised to do so, we needed to seek out a cancer specialist. Someone more knowledgeable than the two we had seen locally who were all dancing around the issue of a treatment plan. Jeff agreed and much to our amazement, the medical oncologist specialist located at Duke University Medical Ctr., agreed with his colleagues we had previously seen in Wilmington. His opinion was that there was nothing that could be done before establishing a 'base-line' for Jeff's disease. That he would compare all future tests every 4 months and go from there- Go WHERE I wanted to scream- if my husband survives past the first quaterly comparrison, he is certainly not going to be around for too many others. He maintained his 'let's 'wait & see what happens' attitude and continued to say, 'we'll do our best to keep you comfortable Mr. Phillips'. There was no treatment plan whatsoever in our consult with this leading oncologist specialist. I refused to accept it. For the first time in my life, I openly disagreed with a specialty physician. (I've dealt w/ many because of Audrey) and we walked out of his office more puzzled than before we had arrived. Jeff was sick and complacent that day, but I knew we would not be back in 4 months as he had instructed us to do. I did ask if we could get some more specific testing done at Duke however while in my mind I knew we would be continuing our search for a better physcian. Day and night I scoured the Internet learning any and everything I could about the type of primary tumor the pathologist had explained Jeff had. It was a rare form of cancer I had never heard of. Carcinoid Syndrome. Meaning, it had already spread to his liver and was now considered to be in advanced stages. No symptoms are normally felt until it becomes 'advanced'. Carcinoid tumors are of neuroendocrine nature, that originate in the cells of the neuroendocrine system and are characterized by the production of serotonin. They are quite rare with only 15 or so in 1,000,000. The complexity of this type of tumor is the secrecy of it's nature. Like I said above, most individuals don't even know they have a cancerous endocrine tumor growing inside of them, until the tumor has grown and reproduced to other organs. They eventually become a burden to the body because the elevated serotonin levels have increased to the place the liver can no longer filter it properly in the bloodstream. At this point, very uncomfortable symptoms begin, similar to irritable bowel syndrome. In earlier days, there have been patients who have expired inappropriately diagnosed, because of carcinoid cancer. Most medical oncologist' today know very little about this type of cancer. They 'may' treat one patient with this condition in their entire career. And when a patient does present himself with this rare diagnosis, the busy oncologist' tend to be very passive in their treatment of it. This is the opinion of many I have met online who have either been diagnosed or dealt directly with this cancer. I'm studying morning, noon and night and telling the oncologist', a professor at Duke University, tests that need to be run from what little I had learned in my research. It was a frightening experience witnessing how he seemed to think Jeff's cancer was too far gone to attempt a fight. I'm on an unstoppable mission to find a physician SOMEWHERE in the world, that would take an aggressive approach to a treatment plan against his cancer. I felt the hour glass had been turned over and the sand of Jeff's life was trickling down. I had to find a doctor that would know how to help us and I had to locate him fast. With many sleepless nights of research and a few very special individuals I had met in the 'not so many' online carcinoid cancer forums, I began to see possible assistance on the horizon. We FINALLY located a very aggressive radiology oncologist who might be able to help Jeff. He is known internationally for being instrumental in reintroducing an important new treatment for end-stage liver cancer. It is the infusion of radioactive microspheres, directly into the tumors, cutting off their blood supply. If successful, it offers a longer prognosis to patients who would otherwise be kept comfortable, with no other treatment option available. We met with Dr. Kennedy and he told us up front that unlike most medical oncologist', he was very aggressive in his treatment of end-stage liver cancer. He also goes on to tell us that one has to meet certain criteria before insurance will cover the costly procedure. The most important being that the patient has to be a proper candidate- like 'where' the tumors are located in the liver and how much good liver tissue is left surrounding the area where the radiation will be infused. My heart was about to beat out of my chest wanting him to inform us as to whether Jeff was a proper candidate or not. But I held my tongue. He had reviewed all of Jeff's tests & scans I had sent prior to the consult, time being of essence in my opinion. And then he began his very organized discussion of precise information regarding the best way to approach and hopefully contain Jeff's liver disease. How wonderful it felt to finally sit before a physician who knew what the heck was going on. He spent 2hrs with us and at the end of his thorough presentation of what lies ahead for Jeff, there was no question that this was the physician we had been searching for. He shook our hands and said, 'I say we get busy getting Jeff some more time'. With tears streaming down my face, I thanked him over and over again. I finally had someone other than myself, a DOCTOR now leading the way in my husbands unique situation. Jeff has been scheduled to receive a 'trial-run' of a few microspheres next Tuesday, June 8th- If his liver accepts them with no adverse response, the following week on June 16th, Dr. Kennedy is going to infuse all tumors in his liver with radioactive microspheres. If successful, his current prognosis could improve by a possible 5yrs. Which feels like a lifetime to us at this point. Our next obstacle will be to have Jeff's primary carcinoid tumor in his colon removed. This may possibly get him even more time. It's a surgery most medical oncologist' are not willing to take on because of it's complex nature- but Dr. Kennedy has already recommended a few surgeons throughout the US for us to consider. One he highly recommends is located in Nashville, TN about 6hrs. from us. The surgery for him to remove the tumor will hopefully be scheduled 6-weeks out from the microsphere treatment. I realize this is a very long explanation of where I have been. But I do have my reasons for including all of the information I did. The biggest comes from a compliment Dr. Kennedy's patient care & research nurse gave to me. She had told me when I had first tried to schedule an appointment w/ Dr. Kennedy, that the only new patients he was accepting were those in critical condition that were referred by a specialist. I was disappointed but didn't argue with her, because I had told her Jeff was already in the advanced stage. She went on to say the oncologist at Duke would probably refer Jeff soon. I managed to find someone who had the ability to contact Dr. Kennedy directly- this person asked him if he would consult with us and much to my relief, he agreed to do so. He told my contact person to have me call his office and ask his research nurse to schedule us an appointment with him. That he would make her aware I would be calling, without a referral. She remembered me from before but still asked if I was the person she had spoken with a few weeks ago. I told her I was. She went on to explain how she was sorry she hadn't been able to schedule the appointment for Jeff before - I told her I totally understood and was just appreciative that Dr. Kennedy was willing to consult with us now. She then went on to say, 'you know, the few carcinoid patients we have seen are generally strong willed individuals like yourself. They aren't referred by a specialist, but manage to get a consult with Dr. Kennedy regardless because they refuse to take no for an answer. She commended me on my determination to advocate the best care possible for Jeff. I tell you this not to seek attention to myself. I tell you because in only a few months I have learned a few very valuable lessons. Never take 'NO' for an answer when it challenges the health & well-being of someone or something you love. Not until you feel in your heart that it is the best response. You will know better in your heart when 'no' is best, more so than a lofty speciliast with a schedule to meet. When it comes to personal medical treatment of any kind these days- always, always do your homework. Don't ever assume professionals you are seeking help from, have already done the research and are giving you the best and most accurate information available. I'm not generally a 'take charge' type of person when it comes to professionals in high places, but I have been forced to take charge in seeking any optimistic help for Jeff. In my doing so, it's possible I may now get a few more years by his side. Had we accepted the 'second opinion' by the specialist at Duke University, well let's just say I'm afraid to even think what we might be doing very soon. Another thing I hope you see from this is that when you find yourself in a mind bending, daunting situation that absolutely consumes you in fear, be it a posionous snake or terminal illness, rise up out of your fear quickly and get busy finding a solution. Had Jeff & I accepted the original treatment options, our remaining time together would have indeed been short. The time we are hopeful for today from the microsphere treatment, is because we broke free from the fear that had encased us both that Friday afternoon and aggressively sought information for ourselves, regarding this rare form of cancer. We realized quickly we didn't have time to be fearful and now we have a very good possibility of 5 more years, which honestly seems like an eternity to us. If you have stayed with and read to this point, thank you for your concern. I hope that if you ever find yourself in a similiar situation, you will see that by pressing on, you will eventually get to where you need to be. The 'survival of the fittest'. I've missed you all so much. I've missed my horsemanship. I don't necessarily feel ready to start engaging in the 'other' issues of my heart right now, but I do believe I 'need' to. I will be assisting Jeff down some treacherous trails, but in order for me to do that effectively, I must take care of me too. He wants that of me and has been nagging me like crazy to go ride my horse, lol. He is now on a long term medical leave of absence until his early retirement kicks in. We have put our mountain cabin on the market and moved to the foothills, closer to where he needs to be. We plan to live each day for the rest of our lives, enjoying life and helping others find their way in challenging situations, to the best of our ability. Thank you Carol for reeling me in, yet once again. Your timing is perfect as always- Thank you Deb, for the loving bridge you so graciously extended to me, making it available for me to comfortably find my way back here. And to each of you that has personally messaged me, I am so touched by your kindheartedness. I will reply soon, I promise. 'Who knew' I would be missed by such strong, seasoned horse lovers? Certainly not me. There is a true family nuclear present here in this forum and I am so proud to be apart of it. Remember waaaayyy up above Jeff saying he had 'unfinished business to attend'? That business is to one day hop up in a saddle for the first time, get some lessons under his belt & ride the trails! He continues to tell me he will get the courage to do so one day soon! :D Until then, he finally got his wife on the water in a kayak last weekend, one of the things he loves to do in life! This wonderful day was possible due to the medication Jeff is now receiving specific to his diagnosis, to control his symptoms.  - 
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Life is good where we are now, most definitely better than where we were a few months ago! I'll keep you posted! With Much Love Always, -Suzie |
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| Docked by the Bay |
OH my dear, God bless you and keep you in his loving arms. We will all have you in our thoughts.
Maggie |
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| thelmanelle |
Suzie,
We don't always know what to say, but prayers go out to Jeff and you. I admire Jeff and your encourage in such a hard time. We hope you will keep us posted as you can. |
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| learningthedance |
Wow. My thoughts, prayers, and every bit of positive energy I can send, are heading your way.
(((hugs))) |
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| PasoBaby_CarolU |
Oh Suzie, I had no idea how serious your absence was. I fully realize how cancer can change your life and you go from being a normal couple to a support person scheduling radiation, chemotherapy, doctor and hospitals. It's wild.
My heart goes out to both of you as you fight this terrible disease. I do wonder, if they remove the tumor, would a liver transplant work then?  Hugs to both of you. You take care of BOTH of you first!
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| bit |
I'm very proud of you, and how you fought for a yes, when all you heard was no. Good girl. You are someone I'd want on my side. Your husband is right. Go ride your horse. They are like medicine, and you'll return with new strength, Ms. Suz. | ||
| becky b |
You and your family are in my prayers. Wish there was something more I could do to help. Please keep us posted. | ||
| 4theloveofjake |
Suz,
I'm so sorry to hear of your struggles and tribulations. You have been a rock in your husbands battle. Thank for the message of "not taking no for an answer" Great advice and very kind of you to remind us all to go with our intuition. My prayers and thoughts go out to you and your husband. |
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| alexwein |
Wow, I also will keep very healing thoughts for both you and your husband! I think Bit and your husband are onto something. Horses can really help heal your heart and soul and also help balance the difficulties you are facing. My very best to you and to Jeff!
Alexandria |
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| misstux |
Suzie, you and your family are in my heart. | ||
| new2thejourney |
It's with love I send this message. I wish both you and Jeff many happy moments together.
Thank you for sharing your story. It is one I will never forget. Karen xx |
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| Gallop On |
Suz, I'm very sorry to hear this. You and your family will be in my thoughts. I agree with everyone else, you are brave for not giving up! Jeff is lucky to have you with him. | ||
| ElaineW |
Dearest Suzie,,
You and Jeff are in my thoughts, heart and prayers.. Hugs to you both.. ElaineW |
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| Clarissa |
Suzie I hope all your bad luck came in one hit & things are now heading upward again to a positive outcome for both of you. 
Good luck with that particular form of treatment. There are so many treatments different to main stream methods that 'normal' doctors refuse to acknowledge. It is good that you have been able to find one suitable. best wishes. |
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| whudson |
Wow. Thoughts, hope and prayers headed your way. You are one strong lady and good for you both for keeping positive and not taking No for an answer. Take each moment as it is given you and never lose hope.
Be sure to post pics of your trail ride 
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| CoolsLadyInRed |
What a shock that must have been for you both. So glad you stood strong for the answer that is best for you and Jeff. Will keep you both in my prayers. God bless. Beth | ||
| jokersmama |
Just found this...
Oh my, your family is in my thoughts and prayers. Keep fighting everyday for your yes' and take some time for yourself when you can, your horse will know just what to "say". When you have time, update us please. |
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| NCMtnGirl |
:DThank's everyone for your concern, warm thoughts & prayers. We took them with us right into surgery last Wednesday~! And now it's time for an update..!We are now 5-days out from the liver directed microsphere radiation treatment and Jeff is doing well. The radiation spheres were sent to each tumor in Jeff's liver through the blood vessel supplying blood needed by the tumor to survive. Once in place, the 'magic beads' begin dosing each tumor individually with small amounts of radiation. Some of the tumors will completely die, others will survive this treatment but shrink in size. This is a link to a 10-second animated video of the procedure for those here interested- it truly is AMAZING! http://www.sirtex.com/video/usa_see_how_sir_spheres_video_flash.cfm Dr. K will be monitoring Jeff's liver by blood tests and scans every two weeks for 8-10 weeks to see how effective the radiation spheres have been. If necessary, we'll go back for round 2 in 10-weeks. For many with end-stage liver cancer, this is their life-saving miracle. Please remember this should you ever learn of someone who is told they are inoperable because of the tumor load in their liver. Like I said in my last post, SO many people don't know this procedure even exists because medical oncologist don't share the same opinions in many cases as radiologist oncologist, in the treatment of extreme tumor loads in the liver. The radiologist oncologist' never gives up- they are very assertive in the treatment of liver cancer. Jeff is currently weak (but up now) and remains pretty nauseated throughout the day from all that is going on inside of his liver- it's going to take about 8-10 weeks for his liver to recover from the radiation. But it's a small price to pay for the return the radiation therapy will bring his diseased liver. A healthier liver that will hopefully be of service to Jeff for a very long time to come! After we stablize his liver- then we go after the tumor in his colon- that sent the tumors to his liver to begin with. My heart goes out to him daily. It's a lot to deal with, but he's very positive & optimistic which I believe plays a very important roll in one's recovery. This afternoon he even sat on the porch and watched me tend my container vegetable garden I have on my porch this year! I snapped the picture below just before they took him into surgery. He looks really sick here doesn't he? LOL! We were just so thrilled that the tumors in his liver were about to be microwaved! With him is our wonderful Dr. Kennedy and his patient care coordinator, Mary. I love these two individuals like you can't believe! They're both brilliant- yet so compassionate. If you ever run into Jeff somewhere, you must promise NOT to tell him I have posted this picture of him in his little surgical hat on a public forum, lol! He would KILL me! But my dear sweet horse lovin' friends here have been so warm and caring over us, I wanted to put a face with his name! And I also wanted you to meet the radiologtist oncologist whose vast knowledge of liver directed radiation, has given Jeff more days to live. Dr. Andrew Kennedy! We love you all~ I'll keep you posted~! Much Love- Suzie! 
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| bit |
Hey, I think he looks handsome! Nice hat! Great smile! If this is him looking sick, he must be something else when he's feeling good! Glad to hear all is going well, and can't wait to see a picture of him when he hits remission! Please keep us posted, ok?
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| 4theloveofjake |
Thanks for the update Suz and I agree Jeff doesn't look too bad in his hat, he is smiling 
May he continue down the road to recovery and God bless him and the caring people around him. |
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| ElaineW |
Hey Suz!
Thanks for the update! I am sending you both loving thoughts, healing prayers and mental hugs! The hat and the smile on Jeff's face look great! Much love your way,, ElaineW |
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| kristie |
I just saw this Suzie, and I'm sending healing thoughts Jeff's way and much strength your way. Take care. | ||
| NCMtnGirl |
Thanks Kristie! We're currently recovering from the liver procedure Jeff underwent back on June 16th. He has good days and not so good which we were told to expect during his 8-10wk recovery. It seems more & more the good days are catching up with the not so good! On his good days he says he's feeling much better than before the procedure. Almost like old times he says! Thanks everyone for your continued prayers and positive thoughts! We're suppose to 'rest & recover' for the next 6 weeks and then we move on to removing the primary tumor in his colon. I'm confident we will conqueor it hard & fast as well. I'll keep you posted! LOVE, Suzie! 
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| PasoBaby_CarolU |
Thanks for the update Suzie....you both stay in our continued prayers.
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| thelmanelle |
Suzie,
Jeff and you are in our thoughts and prayers. I was just thinking about you. Good to hear from you. Yes, Jeff looks handsome in that fancy O.R. hat. They always make you look styling.
Hugs! |
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| Pedestal*Pony |
Suzie,
You and Jeff are in my thoughts and prayers! I hope all is still going well! I admire your courage and how strong you have been for your husband! May God bless you with many more years together! |
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| thelmanelle |
Suzie,
We are still thinking and praying for Jeff and you. |
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| 4theloveofjake |
Yes, I too have been thinking of you and Jeff. Hope all is going well for you both ! | ||
| Chablis |
Oh dear! I'm very sorry to hear about Jeff.  You are both in my prayers as well.
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| Pedestal*Pony |
Hi Suzie,
Just wanted to send healing & loving thoughts your way for you and your husband. Hope all is going well!! |
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| NCMtnGirl |
Hello Family-Just a quick post to say Jeff & I are holding our own in our Cancer challenge! His liver function has improved quite a bit since having the Microsphere surgery and we have been able to get out and enjoy this beautiful earth of ours of late!Soon he'll be scheduled for the removal of his primary tumor and until you hear from me again- you can rest assured we are gleening the most of each day in a positive mindset. In the meantime, my son Wes left on the USS Carter Hall last weekend and is on his way with his Brethren in Arms, to Pakistan. It's a humanitarian mission so it's some better than the front lines in Afghanistan, but I'd just as soon he be on this side of the planet, if you know what I mean. 'He's' excited to be on this mission giving assistance to those in need however. And I support 'him' 150% in 'his' excitement.  
Your thoughts & prayers over he and all of our troops are greatly appreciated. I love you all~! Those I know- and those I don't~! Suzie 
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| thelmanelle |
Well, more prayers your way.
Glad it is looking up. Thank you So for serving us. |
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| becky b |
Still remembering you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. Praying for a full recovery. | ||
| PasoBaby_CarolU |
Suzie, thank you for the update. I am so glad for you guys and support you long distance in prayers and well-wishes. I hope Jeff is one of those successes on the PLUS side of the equation.
(((HUGS))) for your son too. Today is a good day to thank all of our servicemen and women wherever they are. |
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| 4theloveofjake |
Many thanks to your son for his service and selflessness.
So happy to hear you are enjoying life with your husband and enjoying nature and all it has to offer. What an amazing blessing to do so. May he continue to improve, heal and be healthy. Prayers for you and your two guys !! |
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| ElaineW |
It's good ot hear from you!
Still remembering you all in prayer and healing thoughts.. Many hugs your way for you and yours... Elainew |
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| bit |
Hey Suzie, thanks for taking the time to check in and let us all know how things are going. Sounds like hubby is doing well, and taking it one step at a time. Thinking of ya'll and sending healing thoughts and prayers! | ||
| NCMtnGirl |
~Time to Update~Hello Everyone!Gosh, where HAS the time gone? I just wanted to chime in and tell you we have successfully completed another liver radiation treatment and my dear Jeff is recovering nicely. Our hope is that his liver will soon be stable enough to undergo the removal of the primary tumor in his colon. We should know in the next few weeks if it's safe for him to undergo the surgery. My son Wes is now serving in Afghanistan- I'm dealing with it! Audrey is doing well- and me? Well, I'm so happy to report I'm about to have the presence of a horse back into my life~! My husband insists. He continues to tell me he can't bare to see the void in my heart any longer and it's his greatest desire to see me return to my horsemanship! I'm thrilled beyond thrilled and am going to meet with my possible 'next' equine companion tomorrow-!! IF the ice and snow doesn't hinder me! She's a TWH mare, 10yrs young and with a healthy history- and well, from what I've been told about her and the pictures I have received, she does something magical to my heart! We'll see! I wanted to come home here and tell you how much I've missed you all and my horsemanship~! And of course, attach a pic of 'Little Bear'. That is her name with her current companion- from what I hear, it's a given she and I will bond nicely together-!! I hope I can get to sleep tonight, ha! Jeff remains optimistic, living each day to the fullest. He continues to see about my happiness. He is insisting that I find my way back to the saddle and who am I to not finally listen to him?! LOL! LOVE, me~! Hopefully, the next pic will have me in her saddle!~  -  -
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| PasoBaby_CarolU |
Oh Suzie, I'm so glad you reported in. I've been so worried. Glad things are going well.
Welcome back! |
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| 4theloveofjake |
Thanks for checking in with us and for the update Suz and I'm so happy for you and Jeff with all the good news ! Keep us updated on the Little Bear status too ~! | ||
| misstux |
I too am glad to hear all the good news. | ||
| thelmanelle |
Nothing like a hose, a camp fire and the good outdoors to help the soul! Glad things are going well. | ||
| NCMtnGirl |
Hello Loves!
I have some exciting, and I do mean exciting news to share with you today! First things first however. We received an email from Jeff's liver surgeon that his Jan 03 CT Scans show tremendous improvement in his liver health! Allot of his tumors have either been destroyed or are minimized in size by Jeff's Y-90 radiation surgery this past Novemember. He has been cleared for surgery now to have the primary tumor removed from his colon. We are meeting with the surgeon on Valentines Day of all things, lol. We are absolutely thrilled by this! 
I drug you all through some very lengthy & emotional posts in the beginning days of this cancer journey. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for the tremendous support you gave and continue to give to me. You seriously touch my heart with the outreach of concern you have for us. Thank You! Had Elizabeth Edwards been given the treatment option of this amazing Radiologist Oncologist I told you about early on, Dr. Andrew Kennedy in Cary, NC, (right in her back yard), she would most likely still be with us today. It's true. Someone within Elizabeth's family confirmed to an individual within a liver health forum I follow, that the treatment Jeff was blessed to receive, Elizabeth never even knew about. It was the tumors that spread from her breast to her liver, that took her life away so quickly and at such an early age. I have been way down in the valley of despair over the past months but today, I'm elated to tell you, I am on my way to the ridgetop of complete joy, LOL! Literally! I mentioned in my last post I thought I had found my next partner, Little Bear. But the 'Horse God' has another mare in mind for me! My new Morgan mare, Mayday's Diamond, is arriving in 4hrs. to a beautiful stable near where we live. Her human partner of 16yrs had to place her due to financial hardships. The lady she placed her with found out shortly afterwards, that she has breast cancer and is now unable to care for her. The owner's greatest desire was to place her beloved mare where she is confident she will be respected & cared for properly. I'm not worthy, I'm NOT!, but for whatever reason, I was chosen to be her person. My new journey with May (can you believe it Sarah-!!), lol, begins today. I'll bring back pictures of her arrival to share with all of my beloved friends here! I'm so happy, I can't stop crying, haha! Didn't help either that my son woke me up to say good morning from Afghanistan at 5am-!! I'm all over the place in joy (and emotion) right now)!!! LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, Suzie! |
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| NCMtnGirl |
'Ain't She Purty'-!!!!
She's going to be so good for me, (and I her), I just know it!
Meet, May! 
This is her only foal, Shebang- who is now 3yrs of age and placed on a lovely ranch. 
I'll be back tonight with 'Arrival Pics'- I'm BESIDE MYSELF IN JOY! |
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| misstux |
I am sooooo glad to hear all the wonderful news!
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| NCMtnGirl |
Only a few pictures this morning.
This is my first physical encounter with May. To say I am over-joyed is an understatement- spiritually, she sought me out, I'm convinced. I'm OVERCOME w/ joy here! And my beloved Jeff is taking pictures! - 
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. Holding back tears here. (I'm disgustingly emotional and wanting to keep a grip in front of my new MARE)- LOL I'll be back, I can't STAND not being there at the barn w/ her this morning! My first at a true boarding situation- I'm back in my world now! MUAH! |
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| thelmanelle |
I am so happy for you and so loving of Morgans. They are such smart horses and you will be so pleased. I desired a Morgan Gelding that a friend had. She would not part with him...yet they never bonded. He was such a keeper. So happy for you.
I'd still snap that guy up in a heart beat. Great news about your beloved. Blessings!
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| misstux |
Have fun with your Morgan. My Dusty was truly a wonder horse. | ||
| bit |
Well ya got me cryin' now! Wow, could you have ever imagined THIS outcome? I mean, ever? This is a movie, girl! A freakin' Hallmark horse and husband movie. It's a miracle too. For you, your husband and one very lucky mare. You are just full of blessings! Wonderful! And Suzie, you deserve every bit of it. Every bit. | ||
| learningthedance |
Just gave me goose bumps!!
Sooooo happy for you! Congrats!!! She is just beautiful. |
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| NCMtnGirl |
I think it's safe to say Jeff is in good hands & hooves now, LOL!
I know dang well I am~!! If you have time, check out our new barn. We absolutely LOVE it there- it's the cleanest most tranquil horse facility I have ever experienced. The two gals who manage it are AWESOME! I'm hoping soon they'll be posting messages here~! Julie's on the back of the golf cart, Nancy is in the driver's seat. I just love 'em to pieces! They have brought us right into their horse haven there! * 
* www.wrstables.com *  * 
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| jackspark |
Ain't life grand? BEAUTIFUL mare! More pics as you go along......
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| becky b |
Wow what a wonderful story. I am so glad that your husband is doing great and even happier that you found your perfect equine partner. Sounds like things are really working out for you. I am so happy for you. You truly deserve to be blessed and it looks like you are being blessed. Can't wait to see more pictures of you and your beautiful mare together. | ||
| thebundychick |
Oh Suzie.
I only just found this post. You have been on my mind for MONTHS. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I've noticed your abscence on the forums, for quite some time, and find myself wondering where you got to. You've been on my mind for months. And now I know why. I can't imagine your journey. There is some serious go get 'em, guts and determination in your character. Your inner strength is amazing. I pray that you are well, and things are on track with your husbands recovery Best Wishes xx Jane |
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| NCMtnGirl |
Thank You Jane~!
You are such a sweet soul, your message really touched my heart! Things are going along 'good' for Jeff at present. He is experiencing allot more pain from this last radiation treatment than before but he keeps as positive an attitude as anyone I have ever known. His biggest joy these days is being at the stables taking pictures of May and all of the horses there. Amazingly, there is a nice mobile home at the back of the property that was just sitting there being used as storage. I asked if I might clean it up a bit for boarders & staff to use while there and the barn managers were only too happy to oblige-! In just a matter of a few days and a few packages of curtains on sale at Walmart, we had a beautiful boarder's lounge all set up with a big pot of spaghetti going on the stove! Naturally Julie & Nancy (barn managers) were THRILLED and since we're the only boarders that spend any length of time there, it has been pretty much ours all to ourselves! Audrey has her own office there, why she's the finance manager for Windy Ridge now. HAHA! She's working on payroll in the pic I'll post of her below! Jeff's next surgery is scheduled for the week of March 14th, by a carcinoid cancer specialist & surgeon at Vanderbilt Medical Ctr., in Nashville, TN. It was scheduled for the week of February 14th, but his Mother passed away on the day before we were to leave. So we spent that week at the coast with Jeff's family. She was 93 and lived a very full and wonderful life. It was a bit of a shock to the family because she hadn't been 'that' sick prior to her death. She just fell asleep in her living room next to her husband of 74yrs., and never woke up. Everyone was sad of course, but she passed peacefully which was a blessing. I'm still loving my time with my family and of course May! I've learned so much in the past few years of my life and that is, we live for blessing others and the joy of the day we're in. We gleen the most of each moment we are given and relish in the gift of life itself! I missed so much my absence from my horses during that treacherous period last year. But it has given me a whole new outlook on even my horsemanship. I'm suppose to be with a horse and in or at least near a herd. I'm safe there, they heal my heart and comfort my soul daily! I don't want to keep taking up bandwith to post pictures here so if anyone is interested in joining me on facebook, PM me from here and I'll gladly accept you as a friend. Jeff keeps allot of pictures going also on the Windy Ridge Stables facebook page, which you can access if you do facebook! http://www.facebook.com/WRStables Onward & Upward in the gift of each day we continue to canter! :D, Suzie These were taken at Windy Ridge last week! We are there 5 out of every 7 days and most days we have the place all to ourselves-! 
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| PasoBaby_CarolU |
Thanks for the update Suzie, glad to read that Jeff is still doing well. You guys are in our prayers. We're all plugging for him.
May looks like a nice mare. Sounds like she is adding some 'normal' to your lives again. That is good. |